From Memory to Memoir

Dr. Gillman Teaches Others to Share Their Stories

Somedays I look out the window and am baffled. Not so much looking out the window as peering into a screen. The way the world has changed in my lifetime is phenomenal.

It’s not just the world that has changed. I have changed, too. My children never knew the pre-mom me. And my childhood friends likely wouldn’t recognize the adult me.

Memoir writing can be a powerful tool to examine a life well-lived. Recently, Dr. Linda Gillman began leading a class on writing memoirs at Prairie City Landing.

I imagine Linda’s own memoir would be full of the twists and turns that keep a reader turning pages well past their usual bedtime. Diagnosed with leukemia as a teenager, Linda learned to meet obstacles with tenacity and positivity. She became a successful businesswoman who led several nonprofit organizations until she retired to be a caregiver to her husband. When she lost her husband, she asked, “What’s next?” She discovered a doctoral program in Transpersonal Psychology across the country from her North Carolina home. She packed her things, sold her house, and moved to California to enroll in the program.

At the age of 72, she graduated with her PhD. Linda is now a facilitator and mentor to others, she is a published researcher and an author.

In early March, twelve enthusiastic women gathered with Linda at Prairie City Landing to delve into their pasts—reflecting on the events that shaped their lives and identities—and to share these experiences through writing.

During their initial meeting, Linda shared the foundational building blocks of memoir writing. Memoirs, she reminded people, are theme-oriented stories, not your entire life from birth to now. How to get started? Here is Linda’s advice:

1. Pick a theme or focus. What aspect of your life, or event, would you like to examine? Some ideas Linda offers: Educational experiences, childhood games, clubs you joined, parenting, significant relationships in your life, jobs and careers, and major life changes. She reminds writers that the stories don’t have to have happy endings, they should involve some conflict, and they should have meaning for the writer.
2. Once you know what you want to write about, you need to determine WHY you are writing. Who is your audience? What is your purpose for writing? It might be just for fun, or maybe you’d like to share the story with a family member. Maybe you’d like to publish it for others to read.
3. Make a list of story ideas. You know your theme and your audience. What, then, will you tell them? If your theme is educational experiences, you might choose a particular teacher from grade school, an exciting field trip, an engaging class from high school, and a learning experience from adulthood that you didn’t expect. You can come back and add to this list whenever an idea pops into your head.
4. The difference between writers and people who want to write? Actually writing. And the best way to become a writer is to pick a writing schedule and stick to it. When do you have an hour or two each week to devote to writing? Add it to your calendar and when your alarm alerts you, sit down and write.
5. Actually write. Pick one story from the list you created in step 3 and begin. Keep your audience and purpose in mind as you write. Don’t worry about it being perfect—there is no such thing—just put words to a page. Most importantly, have fun!

Reflecting on one’s life can be a form of therapy. Sharing your story with others can be a real gift, opening up a new world for someone else, or pulling back the curtain and letting someone know you better.

Memoir writing is just one of hundreds of events at Prairie City Landing. Curious to learn more? Our Counselors would love to introduce you to our vibrant community.

We know life isn’t only about the big vacations and holiday celebrations. It’s about how you spend your time each day. That’s why we’ve developed many options for you to choose from. Learn more in our Guide: Signature Programs at Tenfold Senior Living.